Contact

After 4.5 years of a closed adoption, Adrien's adoption is now considered open because there is contact with his biological family.  WHAT??????  I know!  It's a long story that started in September with a conversation as we drove to see his brother's first family and has kinda taken off.......where a week ago, Adrien's birth mom send him a message of love and missing.  There will be no visits with her or her family in the near future, but possibly in the distance future, when he's older....and he asks to go and see her. (He has asked a couple of times to see her, I explain that right now she lives too far....so then he wants to go on an airplane)......I'm getting some slack from my family who think I have opened pandora's box and are worried about Adrien.....and while I forgive her actions (or lack there of) against my son, I will never forget...but something struck me, in talking to her and her mom.  Her mom shared that she was assessed and wasn't functioning at full capacity and in talking to her, I can see that.  I would put her at about 15......so my issue is, how do I hold her responsible for her lack of motherly instinct or lack of care of him when she didn't have the capacity to do more than she did...I don't think she was being malicious though I do believe her to be angry....but I think that's due to a lack of understanding.  It is what it is.....and I need to figure it out for me......so that I can guide and support my son.......so, that's what's new, in a nutshell.....