"An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet regardless of time, place or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle but it will never break." -Chinese Proverb


Phone Photo Dump

I have more Phone Photo Dumps at www.adrienandryan.blogspot.com  Sorry, I don't know to link apparently...(LOL)
Monkey fell off bed...waiting at ER to be seen (he's fine)

He looks so unimpressed....oh boy



Trying to love being at home

Me and my eldest niece....love her

Meeting my cousin's boy....they are 4 months apart....we are in trouble


O' Canada

The boy is learning  lot  in JK....his imagination has exploded....his awareness has increased.....he's learning so much at school....I was worried about him, but he's a strong kid....he's matured.....today....on a 30 minutes drive, he must of sang this versus 168 times!!!


Fall Photos 2012

I married a wonderful man who is a talented photographer.....today I voluntold him that he would be taking pictures of our children....at the local jail....today.....like in 5 minutes....lol the files are HUGE so I only uploaded three of my favourite pictures

to see my "less than" professional pictures... look at www.adrienandryan.blogspot.com


Rough Day

Today was interesting.....it started off really great......ok, some background....Ryan is having difficulty following redirection, can be whiny and cries a lot.  I understand that this transition is difficult for him and for the rest of the family, including me.....I know that Ryan is trying to figure it out....he doesn't let me out of his sight, he follows me around or always wants to be in my arms.....(PLEASE NOTE: I'm not complaining....and I understand what this little man must be feeling and I KNOW this is hard for him). I'm sharing our rough day because I believe we had a break through...it was small, but it was there....at around 3, he started what can be described as a "hyper" behaviour, where he runs around the house, picking up things and throwing them everywhere.....throwing his body on the ground, hitting Adrien or hubby, squealing and not easy to redirect.  I could see hubby was ready to lose his patience...and this is a man who has the patience of a saint, he has to, to put up with me! lol....(rewind to yesterday, I spent about 30 minutes teaching Ryan some signs, including down, milk and all done) I picked him up and he started to cry, so I cradled him in my arms.....he continued to cry (I have witnessed in other environments with other people, that when he would cry, he was given what he wanted)....I began whispering in his ear that he was safe....and when he was done crying I would put him down.  Adrien didn't like seeing his brother cry and Adrien tried to comfort his brother.  I didn't think it was fair to Adrien to see his brother upset so I took Ryan upstairs to his room, where I continued to cradle and rock him while he cried and sobbed.  I needed to show him that no matter how bad or sad he was, I would always be there to love him, to take care of him.  After a VERY long while, he finally quieted.....I hugged and kissed him and let him go.  He immediately turned back to me, with his arms wide open and placed his head on my shoulder.....My heart soared for him....we held each other for a couple of minutes...when he let go of me, he had a huge smile on his face and signed down......so we headed downstairs.....both of us, a little bit different for what we had just shared and a little bit more in love with each other.  I know it's going to be a long road for us, until he feels totally secure and safe and bonded with us....but I think it started today....



Fun times at the park

we had a great night tonight.....seeing the silver lining.....I had forgotten what a little one was like.....and just need to find my groove....
Adrien loves pulling his brother

Dear Gramma Great

Why can't they all be like you?  Things have gone from bad to worse in trying to meet birth mom.....foster mom can't let go....Hubby and I are arguing about it.....I feel sick to my stomach about the stuff the foster mom is pulling......I wish you, Gramma Great, was the rule and not the exception...you should be the measuring stick for all foster parents in the world.....you will never know how much your support and love was appreciated through our transition with Adrien....and how lucky EVERY SINGLE person you have touched is.....you are loved....



Ryan is home.....and it is good......very busy but very good.  We went to visit my dad yesterday...we try to go about once a week....it was the first visit that Ryan was home forever!  Ryan loves all things mechanical, tractors, power tools, vacuums and the likes....so my dad's place is like his mecca.  We had fun.....lots and lots of fun!
My dad loves his grandkids.....though I think he feels he has more liberties with his daughters kids than my brother's kids....most of that is cultural as daughters tend to stay closer to their families and sons tend to support their wives families.....Not a bad thing, just kinda how it happens. And now there's Ryan, a boy who loves the same things as his Nonno.....and Adrien is starting to explore more too, with things that Ryan and Nonno like.....I love it! 

Nonno, the story teller


Dear Adrien
I'm writing this on the night before your brother joins our family forever.  There are things I want to say to you and share my wishes with you.
Things are changing for you, they have to.....we wanted to give you a sibling and we want to raise another child.  You have been the sunlight in our lives since you came home.  You have been gentle, amazing, smart and loving.  You are a wonderful person with so much charisma in you that it shines through.  Tonight, on the eve that you become a big brother permanently, I am sad and excited for you and us.  You and I have had many many wonderful adventures....

My love, I can't even describe how I'm feeling right now....just now, that I will love you forever.....you will always be my baby boy.......you are forever in my heart


I have decided to keep writing here......things have happened and I need my safe internet world to vent.....to people that hopefully won't judge me.....so here goes.....
The last 5 weeks have been the longest adoption transition ever.....starting out on this road for a second time, I thought all foster parents were like the Greats....(though I knew they were a more special than most)....I thought these foster parents would at least be good....I have dubbed her the Foster Monster.....she has taken liberties, made assumptions and has been passive aggressive throughout Ryan's transition.  I originally started the new blog as a place that Ryan's birth mom could go to see updates and hear about he is doing.....it morphed into my new "spot" to be me.  In retrospect (one of my "problems" is trusting until proven otherwise) I should have kept that blog for just Ryan and this one for our life......so, I'm back.....and Ryan comes home tomorrow.....and I'm temporarily done work for this year.....Our days are filled with taking Adrien to school, appointments and bonding.....It's going to be wonderful!