Sick Kids

The boys have been sick......like visit the ER sick.  Started last Saturday, both boys fevered.  Adrien fevered for three days, Ryan for a few hours.  On Sunday, Adrien complained of pain in his sides.  I'm not normally a panicky mom (after my friends talk me off the ledge) but my gut was telling me something wasn't right and hubby was telling me the boy was fine.  So I brought Adrien into the ER on Sunday night, thinking it was his appendix.  We were triaged as a 2 because his oxygen was border line low.  I panicked.....I asked the nurse what her concern was, she responded pneumonia....We were in and out of x-ray an hour later.  Turned out Adrien had the beginning of a chest infection.  I immediately asked the doctor if it was contagious cause I knew Ryan would be next.  As we were leaving, I said to the doctor, I'll see you here next week with my other boy...... Sure enough, last night Ryan was having a hard time sleeping.  As I cradled him in the early hours of the morning, I noticed his breathing was off.  Hubby wasn't too concerned, thinking it was just some mucus congestion as Ryan  had been coughing and had a runny nose.......as I sat there rocking my baby and I knew something wasn't right.  As I had friends over for the weekend, hubby brought Ryan to the ER.  We texted each other, joking about the wait time and how tired Ryan was.  Hubby shared that his temperature was 40.2 (104) and he was going for a chest xray....and I knew....I knew Ryan had pneumonia,  two hours later I got another text confirming my fear and stating that the doctor wanted to watch Ryan's vitals for a couple of hours before sending him home due to the high fever.  They came home at 5:30 in the morning.  Ryan nuzzled into me a slept soundly for a few hours (there was too much technology at the hospital for Ryan to look at rather than sleep)......In the middle of today, as I was tucked into the air mattress with either boy securely embraced in my arms did I reflect on how I was feeling the night before.  What that gut feeling was?  How I just knew something wasn't right with Ryan?  How I could possibly be so connected to these two boys who call me mama though weren't of my body?  How I could be the luckiest person in the world to be able to call these children my sons.