"An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet regardless of time, place or circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle but it will never break." -Chinese Proverb


Anti adoption

I've been doing a lot of reading latey of blogs belonging to adoptive parents and adoptees. I was very ignorant when I can across the term anti adoption. I felt very defensive. How dare people be against adoption. Don't they know that's how we became a family. Then I started reading about it, and I get it! I get what they are saying about adoption though I don't feel we fit in that category. I didn't know that people adopted in some places don't have access to their birth certificate, I knew that promises made in open adoption agreements were sometimes broken, I know that due to some laws in international countries fill orhanages, but what about my son. How is all this information going to affect him. I now refer to his birth mom as his first mom and his foster mom as his second mom, I want to be honest with him about everything about where he came from and today after reading his profile again (which I hadn't done since we got him) I feel very different about what was written and it has given me hope that when it comes time to disclose I will be able to do so with respect for his first mom. It is such a different world, reading the blogs of the anti adoption, that I am hopefully gaining valueable insight to how my son might feel as he gets older and tries to discover himself. I just read a good debate on the term "forever family" and will probably never use it again as what the author shared rang true for me.
I'm glad I stumbled across the sight as I find I'm learning more about myself and how to be a better parent to my son.

1 comment:

  1. That's good of you. I still feel very defensive but it's true that our situations are quite different than a lot of adoption reformers. My son has an open adoption, knows his birth and grand parents and has his original brth certificate right here in the house! Times have changed.