Things have been difficult the last few days with Ryan. It seems like we get a stretch of good days (2 steps forward) then a few hard days (one step back). We have had visitors and he has been hitting kids, he cries/whines from the time he wakes up until he goes to sleep. He's trying to get into everything, take everything from Adrien and just over all unsettled. I'm coming to terms with the fact that there is a very real possibility that he has a form of Sensory Processing Disorder and have been reading book upon book (though I know about SPD for work, it's different when it's at home) and have found exercises and strategies to help him learn to integrate his senses. He's slowly coming along with his speech and is very very quick to learn new signs and use them unprompted, though he needs a lot of modeling for the words, which makes sense as he has an oral motor delay, that can be directly related to SPD. We continue to go forward and keep working with him, he is very very clever child and learns best through observation. He is an endearing child who hubby and I continue to fall more and more in love with each day. Sometimes though, the challenges are overwhelming and I just want to cry.
Adrien seems to be doing ok though he stated that when he grew up he would be moving back in with Grandma and Grandpa Great. Though this broke our heart, we realize he is just trying to figure out where he belongs and his identity as a person in our family, community and society. Since starting school, he has matured so much.....he is no longer a preschooler and definitely a little boy, with independent original thoughts. Though we had it easy with him as a baby until now, I have a sneaking suspicion that parenting him could become more challenging as he is very persuasive and logically in his arguments in why he should be allowed to do or have something. I just want to eat him up when he uses big kid words like impossible and appropriate.
Lots of great things happening around here along with some things that need to be taught and redirected.....but it all makes it worth it when the boys love on each other and on us.
also..... www.adrienandryan.blogspot.com has gone private. If you would like to be added to the list, please comment with your email address.
Thank you for posting your thoughts and feelings. Often times many people assume that life after adoption is all flowers and sunshine and the fact is that more often than not with "older" children there are many difficult days.
ReplyDeleteYou are helping those who are adopting understand that the feelings they have are NORMAL... so thank you :)